VANCOUVER’S MOST AWESOME EVIL: DEERMAN OF DARK WOODS

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In the spirit of Halloween, I’m putting away my ‘if it’s not ponies and rainbows’ motto to bring you Deerman of Dark Woods.  For those of you who are not familiar with Deerman or Barrier Kult, they are an underground group devoted to destroying the weak and feeble trends of skateboarding through militant worship of nature, specifically barrier violence.

What makes Vancouver so awesome?

THE BARRIER KULT ORIGINATORS ARE FROM THE AREA THAT ESTABLISHED OUR INITIAL DARK FOLKLORISH BASE: THE INTERIOR OF BC.  AFTER I WITNESSED THE LEGENDARY ANIMAL-LIKE PHANTOM OF THE OKANAGAN WOODS – THE ‘DEER MAN’ – THE BARRIER KULT WAS ESTABLISHED AND I WAS TITLED ‘DEER MAN OF DARK WOODS’.  THE TERRIFYING LORE OF THE DARK WOODS OF THE INTERIOR SPILT INTO STREAMS THAT LED MYSELF AND THE BARRIER KULT THEOLOGIES INTO THE LOWER MAINLAND.  THE RAIN FORESTS AND THE CONCRETE THAT HAS BEEN FRAMED AND ENVELOPED BY THE DARK MOUNTAIN RANGES MAKES ‘VANCOUVER’ A PLACE OF RITUAL AND AWE.  ASCEND INTO THE MOUNTAINS – THE VOID OF OBLIVION.  THE OCEAN SHORES HAVE ALSO BEEN GOOD TO BARRIER KULTIST ‘DEPTH LEVIATHAN DWELLER’ AS HIS INTERIOR OGOPOGO SERPENT ROOTS ARE NOW IN TERRIFYING SYMMETRY IN THE WAKE OF VANCOUVER ISLAND’S SEA SERPENT CADBOROSAURUS.

Who’s your favourite Vancouverite?

THE TITLED BARRIER KULT MEMBERS OF THE LOWER MAINLAND:

DEPTH LEVIATHAN DWELLER

VLAD MOUNTAIN IMPALER

BLACK GLOVE OF INTERNAL COMBUSTION

HAMMERER OF ROOTS

MUSKELLUNGE OF DARK ISLAND

STATUE OF THE BLACK CROW

FINGER POINTING TO OBLIVION

IN ESSENCE AND VIOLENT RITUAL – THE BARRIER KULT DOES NOT WORSHIP HUMAN FIGURES.  THE BARRIER KULT WORSHIPS FEARSOME REPRESENTATIONAL MOVEMENTS.  THE DARK CLAD PHANTOMS OF SKULL SKATES AND WHAT SKULL SKATES REPRESENTS.  VANCOUVER-BASED BLACK WAR METAL BANDS SUCH AS BLASPHEMY AND CONQUEROR.  ALSO – THE VICIOUS CIRCLES OF NATURE THAT RULE OUR COAST AND, ONCE ASCENDED AND DRAWN FROM THE RAW DEPTHS OF OCEAN, SOIL AND ROOTS, SHALL EVENTUALLY REGAIN POWER.

Where’s your favourite place to eat in Vancouver?  What’s your favourite dish?

MY EARLY ‘ALGERNON BLACKWOOD-ESQUE’ INCREDIBLE ADVENTURES IN THE INTERIOR OF BC LED TO THE VIVID CONSUMPTION OF SOIL AND ROOTS IN THE DARK WOODS OF EARLY TIGHT TRANSITION BARRIER WORSHIP RITUALS.  IN THE LOWER MAINLAND, MOST CONSUMPTION ALSO COMES FROM THE KULT’S NUMEROUS BARRIER AREAS AND THEIR PROCESSES OF RITUAL.  THE DUST SOIL INGESTION AND BLOOD SHAVING OF THE ‘RITUAL’ BARRIER, THE OCEAN WATER AND VIVID SUNLIGHT OF THE ‘MAGICAL’ BARRIER.  THE BLOCKS OF THE ‘WITCHES SABBAT’ PROVIDE FOR CLOSER REPRESENTATIONS OF FOOD – INGESTION OF VARIOUS VEGETATION.  WHEN SCRAPED, THE FOODS OF THE FAR EAST CAN BE FOUND IN THE DUST RIDDEN TRANSITIONS OF THE ‘ST. GEORGIAS EMBANKMENT’; THE PIT AND THE RANCID PUDDLE.  EVEN SO, MANY MEMBERS OF THE BA. KU. CANNOT INGEST FOOD DUE TO PLAGUE AND VARIOUS DISEASES.  FAMINE.

Where’s the best place to be in Vancouver on a sunny day?

IN FULL SITE OF THE MOUNTAINS – ARCED WITH THE OCEAN IN VIEW.  SEEING THROUGH PLAGUED AND GREY EYES THE MOUNTAINS AND DARK WOODS THAT FRAME AND SPILL INTO THE OCEAN.  THE LOCATION OF THE ‘MAGICAL’ BARRIER CAN PROVIDE SUCH A SIGHT TO BEHOLD VIA REALIZATION, ASCENSION, AND THE RITUAL TAILBLOCK.

What’s your favourite thing to do on a Saturday night?

OTHER THAN THE MOON DRAWING THE TIDES OF THE DARK BLACK OCEAN – THE BARRIER KULT DOESN’T PARTAKE IN FOLLOWING CERTAIN ‘DAYS’.  NIGHTLY VIOLENT BARRIER TIGHT TRANSITION RITUALS ARE FOUND ON MOST NIGHTS.  BONE SCRAPING, BLOOD SHAVING, BARRIER KNIFING (THE ‘SKATEBOARD’ SCRAPED AND STRENGTHENED AS KNIFE) – THE ACT OF VICIOUS BLACK ARTS BARRIER ASCENSION IS FOUND IN THE ‘NIGHTS’ AND DURING THE ‘DAY’; THE GROWTH OF NATURE.

Where is your favourite place to skateboard in Vancouver?

THE MOST POWERFUL ACTS OF MILITANT BLACKS ARTS BARRIER VIOLENCE HAVE BEEN FOUND AT:

THE RITUAL BARRIERS.

What are you dressing up on Halloween as?

N/A

If you were in Vancouver and I gave you a hundred bucks, how and where would you spend it?

VINYL LP COPIES OF MYSTIFIER’S ‘WICCA’ – DISTRIBUTED TO BARRIER KULT FOLLOWERS.

THE ACTS OF THE BARRIER KULT ARE ONLY A SHADOW COMPARED TO THE TRUE RITUALS OF BLACK WAR METAL BANDS SUCH AS SOUTH AMERICA’S MYSTIFIER.

DEER MAN OF DARK WOODS IS SUPPORTED BY:  PD’S HOT SHOP, SKULL SKATES, EMERICA, AND HEROIN SKATEBOARDS.