If you’re like us, a couple of weeks ago you wouldn’t have been able to fathom the Flames beating out the Canucks in the first round of the Stanley Cup Playoffs. It seemed like a sure thing for our team to end our bitter competitors’ season but here we are, out of the game as those pesky Albertans (many of them who live among us and are reading this) are revelling in our loss.
Our mayor was pretty sure that the Canucks were going to win too. So he made a bet with Calgary’s mayor, Naheed Nenshi, which ended in Gregor wearing a Flames jersey and reading this poem in City Council chambers this week. Nenshi roasted us like a Kenny Rogers chicken, and the poem is actually hilarious. The full words that our mayor read are below, and you can watch him reading them HERE.
On the edge of the country
Where the mountains meet the ocean
We’re trying to build something new.
Dare we say… something better.
And that’s good.
The condos leak.
The cauldron fails to rise.
Nickelback moves in and young people move out.
(can we rebuild for that?)
The twins can’t score.
But these kids in red (who are they?) can.
Diving’s not a Winter Olympic sport?
And we’re still at zero cups and counting.
(not Starbucks cups)
Pucks fall in our net
Like cherry blossoms in spring
So very pretty
(Maybe we should rethink the whole waving white towels thing?
Why surrender all the time?)
Bieksa’s trash talk
No good for hockey
Set off fireworks!
Ours is the longest golf season in the country!
And we’re not Edmonton.