"Flashy" and "fast food" don't really seem to go together like a slice of cheese on a burger, but melding those two worlds is the essence of Monzo Burger, Kitchen Table Group's splashy new restaurant officially opening September 9 at Vancouver House.
Based on a pop culture wave out of Milan in the 80s, where young people got revved up about fast cars, trendy fashion, and American fast food, Monzo Burger represents a long-time dream come true for KTG's celebrated chef, Mark Perrier, who always wanted to open a burger concept.
Perrier says he's a big fan of burgers and eats them regularly. He was keen to come up with a burger menu centred on a house-ground beef smash patty, with just the right amount of seasoning to preserve that deep, beefy flavour packed into every crispy, juicy morsel.
Monzo Burger: On the menu
Here you'll find single or double burgers on pillowy, buttery brioche buns, available unadorned or decked out, like with bacon and cheese or the "King Monzo." There's The Wrangler, a double burger with bacon, house BBQ sauce, aioli, charred onions, Swiss cheese, and pickled jalapeños, or the upscale Italian riff on the McChicken, called the Chicken Milano, which is a fried chicken cutlet with arugula, parmigiano, and garlic aioli on a sesame seed bun.
Their chicken tenders are the real deal, plump and juicy and perfectly breaded, seasoned and fried. Shakes come standard or in boozy iterations for the grown-ups (the Golden Arches could never), and they're made using Monzo's creamy soft serve gelato, which you can also get on its own in a cup or as a sundae with salted caramel or chocolate sauce; the soft serve is so impeccably creamy that you might pinch yourself for how much this is like a fast food fever dream levelling-up of a childhood favourite.
Monzo Burger's menu reads like that of a familiar fast food joint, for certain, but it's clear this is for those in search of a slightly elevated experience - even if you are wiping burger sauce off your chin with one hand and plucking a beef tallow-fried onion ring out of paper carton on a plastic tray (complete with paper liner festooned with colourful cartoony animal characters).
Kids can get their burger combos served up in a cardboard Lambo (red, grey, or yellow) that might capture imaginations along the lines of Vancouver's own you-know-who's pirate ship.
Outside, a couple of real Lamborghinis with Monzo decals are parked out front. Apologies to all the admiring "kids," but, no, you can't play with them.
Monzo is the kind of fast food joint that has comfy booth and bench seats (and a very striking all-orange semi-private group dining nook), as well as a DJ booth, and a bar with a neon yellow plastic "curtain" shielding those on the stools from the kitchen's burger grease.
The space is modern, thanks in no small part to the fact that it's the base of the Vancouver House, with its impossible glass curves and angles. This was the spot celeb chef David Chang had picked out for Momofuku, but the pandemic forced him to let go of the expansion for his popular U.S. noodle restaurant.
KTG has had the keys to the space for about a year, but the pandemic created delays in the arrival of the specialized kitchen equipment - fryers, grills - Monzo Burger is using to produce its menu of retro-Italiano burgers, shakes, and sides.
Fuelled by 80s kid nostalgia
Perrier admits he's a "kid of the eighties" so he has a deep nostalgia for classic fast food, including the era when McDonald's fried their signature thin-cut fries in beef tallow.
The chef says absolutely, yes, that's why at Monzo the default is to fry in beef tallow (rendered beef fat), which means tallow-fried fries, onion rings, and even an apple hand pie for dessert - for those who remember when McD's actually fried their rectangular pies. However, they do have the option to dunk your order in sizzling vegetable oil instead - just ask.
To that end, while Monzo does have a veggie burger on the menu, it might be tough for non-omnivores to hang out inside the restaurant, as the air definitely holds that beefy aroma that may not be tantalizing for everyone.
For meat-eaters, though, it's like a sensory beacon signalling what's to come.
"No offense," my 10-year-old whispered to me inside the massive downtown restaurant space, "but that poster over there looks like an old Burger King ad," he said, nodding towards a huge sign on the wall depicting a larger-than-life King Monzo burger.
"That's exactly the point," I replied.
Monzo Burger's grand opening is Saturday, Sept. 9 at 11 a.m., when the restaurant will be giving away free cheeseburgers to the first 100 guests. The restaurant's street address is 1401 Granville St, but if you're using a cellphone mapping app, you might get steered wrong; Monzo is across from Linh Cafe and you might do better plugging neighbours Autostrada, Fresh St Market, London Drugs, or even just "Vancouver House" in to get you there. Monzo Burger will be open 11 a.m. to midnight.
Follow @monzo.burger on Instagram for more info and updates.
Video: Taste-driving Monzo Burger
@forkingawesomevia Flashy fast food fever dream fuelled by 80s nostalgia, what? 🍔#forkingawesome #vancouverbc #burgers ♬ Beat Goes On - The All Seeing I
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