Ryan Beil: 3 rules for heckling at the ballpark

Heckling at the ballpark is both a time-honoured tradition and a contentious topic of conversation.

It can be jarring, surprising, annoying even, to have some knucklehead seated next to you in the stands suddenly (and loudly) start yelling at a player about their batting prowess, fielding ability, or ineptitude on the basepaths.

It can also be liberating, fun, and life-fulfilling to be the knucklehead doing the shouting. 

Basically, some people love it and some people hate it. I don’t know how you feel, but I happen to love it. Within reason!

When you first start watching baseball games, you realize that it’s the perfect sport to heckle at. It’s not slow, it’s focused. The story of the game is told moment to moment. And often those moments are hushed with anticipation. 

This leaves a perfect little window for someone in the stands to give a ballplayer on the opposing team a piece of their often sun-stroked and usually beer-addled mind.

It can come from a place of loyalty. Some see it as a sworn duty, to try and do everything in their power to distract and disrupt the enemy team. Others are simply seeking attention. If I’m being honest, I tend to fall into the latter group. 

Whatever the reasons, all in all, I support heckling at the ballpark. But, as I already stated above: within reason! And today, I’d like to share that “within reason” with you.

Here are three golden rules to live by, if you decide to heckle at a ballgame:

1. Don’t be a bully

Everyone on the field at a baseball game is a human being. Even the umpires, I’m told. The players you watch at The Nat are elite athletes chasing a lifelong dream and are some of the top performers in their field, in the world. It’s one thing to be a bit cutting about a player’s tendency to chase a breaking pitch outside the zone. It’s another thing to call their character into question.

2. Think about the people around you

This is the same as “knowing your audience” as a comedian. Before you heckle, look around. Are you surrounded by kids and families? If so, maybe leave your profanity-laced zingers in your word quiver.

3. Your heckling may backfire

I used to heckle a lot more than I do now. Admittedly, I even got a little obsessed with it. I was even known to do oppo research on some of the good players coming into town so I could surprise them with a taunt about their high school mascot. 

But I gotta say, my overall record…ain’t so good. I think, more often than not, my best lines/shouts/yellings have usually been followed by the player on the receiving end knocking one out of the park. And then everyone in my section blaming and ostracizing me.

Just know that if you choose to heckle, you could be the last bit of fire that ignites a player into the game of their life. You could be the motivation. You could be the catalyst.  

You could be the fool. 

But here’s the thing: Every now and then…the fools are right! 

What do you think? Do you support heckling at a ballgame? Think I’m wrong about my rules? Come heckle me about it! As always you can find me, down at the Nat.